Ephesians 3:20

And so I woke up with this verse in my head this morning, and I felt so full of joy it was uncontainable:

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us

And I knew it was the Lord, reminding me of how completely vast and infinite His power is, how great His love for me, and how small my faith, because a) I never get verses... I have a rubbish memory for numbers and particular phrases and I just don't have any verses that I can recite, and b) I haven't got to Ephesians in my Bible study yet, so I've never actually read this verse.

It reminds me of something someone dear (and wise) said to me; that to see all the options in front of us leaves God out of the equation. How true that is and how completely humbled and in awe I am right now.

I was so wrapped up in whether we'd get funding for ONE kid, the thought that He might do a complete and utter MIRACLE never even crossed my mind.

How I love the Lord. He cares for me so well.

First PGD Appointment

Today we had our first PGD appointment at Care Nottingham.

WOW is all I can say!!!

Again, to echo my last post, God is good! (Why does this always surprise me so much?)

1) We not only have the unlimited funding already in place, but we are also funded for subsequent children. Like... WOW. It was a completely jaw-dropping moment; I don't think I've ever been so amazed in all my life!

And the news keeps getting better...

2) We can get going right away. The info sheet we had from Care prior to the appointment prepared us for a 3 month wait after this appointment. The couple we met on Sunday had a 6 month wait (at Guy's Hospital London) after their first appointment. We can get going... now?

3) The odds of it working are WAY better than we were led to believe previously. Care do "Array CGH" (Comparative Genomic Hybridization). They have been doing this for PGD for the past two years (replacing the FISH procedure). I guess the FISH procedure led to the 1/5 statistics we were quoted at Leicester Royal. With CGH, Care had 50% success rate in 2010, and 30% last year, leading to an average of 40%. And for those that produced a healthy embryo and reached implantation, in 2010 80% succeeded, and last year 55%.

So I worked out (such a stats geek!) that on our first go, we have a 40% chance of it working, a 32.5% chance of it producing a good embryo but not implanting, and a 27.5% chance of there being no viable embryos (that will not happen in Jesus' name!).

With the NHS funding, we get two funded cycles to see if we produce viable embryos.

The only not so great news - my ovaries. The PCOS is severe - my antral follicle count is 70+ (a high count is 30+). Because of this, I have been put on metformin right away. Then in July I am going to have drugs to bring on a bleed, then take the Pill for a month to bring on another bleed, and we will cycle on day 18 of my cycle after that. I'm going to have the Short Protocal, and daily monitoring (because of the high count).

In regard to my ovaries, 2 Corinthians 12:10 keeps coming to my mind: "When I am weak, then I am strong." His power is made perfect in my weakness. Your will not mine, Lord.

Having such a high antral follicle count seems to have good and bad aspects:

• "When there are an average (or high) number of antral follicles, we tend to get a "good" response with many mature follicles. We tend to get a good number of eggs at retrieval in these cases. Pregnancy rates are higher than average." 
• "High count, watch for polycystic ovary type of ovarian response.
  Likely to have a high response to low doses of FSH product.
  Higher risk for overstimulation and ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome.
  Very good pregnancy rate overall."

(http://www.advancedfertility.com/antralfollicles.htm)

If I get severe OHSS, the cycle will be cancelled, and embies frozen on day 1. I am pretty resigned to getting mild OHSS with such a high count (perhaps I shouldn't be, and should be walking in greater expectation of miracles!), but I am pretty hopeful that they will be able to keep it mild with the constant surveillance and extra attention they will give me.

Such a high count basically means (I think) that I am extremely fertile in IVF terms (yay me!!) which is much better than having limited fertility... So it may take us a while to get there but get there we will. 

I have been on a more PCOS friendly diet for a few weeks now. It make me feel better if nothing else.

Thank you Lord so much for all your kindness and graciousness.

I LOVE that we might have the Prophet and Light!!!!

Amazing Grace

A few weeks ago I asked our small group leader if she could set us up with anyone at church who had been through IVF/infertility. She responded a few days later and said she had someone - and I was amazed as we already knew this couple! (Some background - we go to a church with around 2000 members, and we are not very involved/outgoing people so the pool of people we know there is pretty minute. We happened to meet this couple at a 'Newcomers Meal' last year. They were the only couple we really connected with there, and we talked to them all evening. I remember I was very nervous - I can be very anxious socially - and was so relieved we found a couple with so much in common to talk to. Little did we know how much we have in common!)

So today we were introduced after morning service. And guess what...? She is a balanced translocation carrier (different chromosomes) and they've had IVF PGD two times (yup, that's right, two cycles) and now they have THREE children. Not only did it work both times for them (pretty impressive at 1/5 odds a cycle) but second time they had twins.

She said that prior to being diagnosed as a carrier, she had had five miscarriages. She said: "Have the doctors encouraged you to try naturally?" (Yes.) "Well, don't. IVF was a walk in the park in comparison to the miscarriages."

I felt like that was divine reassurance that we are doing the right thing! It addressed my specific concerns. God is good.

And the icing on the cake... She also has PCOS, like me.

What are the odds? BT carrier, with PCOS, having had PGD successfully - at our church? And we know them?

God is good.